“Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired”. The feeling of being in love is the most overwhelming emotion. It sweeps you off your feet! You feel so light and you feel so delighted all day long. The day-dreaming passes into the evening too. Love is a strong bond between two people. It keeps them together no matter what. True love is truly enchanting. It is what you can find once in a lifetime.
Yet, love, when lost, leaves a deep scar over people. Moving on from a failed relationship is very hard. It is a traumatizing experience. One goes through a roller coaster ride of gripping emotions. When someone becomes so much part of your life, letting them go all of a sudden leaves you wounded. Nostalgia and missing that special someone becomes your daily routine. The person who meant the world to you is not beside you anymore! You feel so defeated, when the person who you thought would be yours forever breaks up with you. Losing the person you love and losing a part of yourself with them are very hard to get over. The heart seems to be broken beyond repair! Only time can heal the wound.
You begin to feel like you have lost your soul mate, the one person who understood you so well and fit right into your life. And the worst part is, you feel like you’re never going to find someone like that again.The very thought of having broken up shatters you. In this article, I have written about the ten emotional catastrophes one goes through after a failed relationship. These are:
10. Suicidal thoughts
When you have gotten over a broken relationship, sometimes, you tend to get suicidal thoughts. It is unavoidable. You feel like you have lost everything and nothing worthwhile is left for you in your life. Everything seems morbid and you feel like escaping out of the endless pit you have fallen into. It feels as if everything has come to an end, and your life must end too.
However, this is not true at all. Everything is just a passing phase. It shouldn’t deter your spirit and goals. Talk to your parents and friends and come out it gradually. Do not take any extreme step.
9. Lack of interest and enthusiasm in activities
Yes, it is true. Everything seems dull and monotonous to you. All you see is ennui. Activities that you loved doing no longer seem interesting to you. You find it so hard to move on with your daily life and your routine. You either sleep or worry and brood! Your productivity hits its all time low. Ironically, in fact, if you take your negative thoughts away and try and focus on healthy activities, you will come out of the sorrow.
8. Losing self confidence
After your loved one walks away from you and moves on, you may start to lose your self confidence. You develop a strong inferiority complex. You start avoiding people, even the ones who are close to you. You don’t go out there to meet new people, for the fear of rejection. You feel that other people will look down upon you. Do not believe any rumours and do not care of what other people think or speak about you. There is this stigma attached to a failed relationship. Just because your relationship has failed due to various reasons, it does not mean you are a failure.
7. Feeling very lonely and depressed
Loneliness and depression are the biggest emotional catastrophes one goes through, after a break up. You shut yourself out from the eyes of the world and go into that dreary mental space of yours that can only make you feel all the more lonely. You have to make the move and start mingling with new people. Only then will the feeling of loneliness fade away. You have to get into the crowd and forget all worries. It is not easy, but it is the only way to leave the past behind.
6. Wanting to get back together again
“Was it a mistake?”, “I should not have ended it! It was so perfect!”, “I knew this was the one! I may never find someone like this again!” are some thoughts that repeatedly strike your one. Everyone is afraid of what lies ahead. We always want to go back to the past which seemed just right. But change is the norm of life! So what if things ended? Everything happens for a reason, a good one at that! Sooner or later things will fall into place.
5. Blaming yourself and feeling guilty
Blaming yourself for the way things turned out will not solve your problem. There is absolutely no need to feel guilty and feel distraught. It could have been the other person’s fault too. May be you weren’t understood after all! What then, is the point of being in such a relationship? There may be a hundred reasons why it didn’t work out, and some, beyond your control. It’s just destiny at the end of the day. If it was meant to be, it will be. Besides, blaming yourself for everything diminishes your morale and confidence. You should not be too hard on yourself.
4. Want of another relationship soon
Thoughts of getting together with another person soon are common. But it only makes you desperate! It is not always a good idea. Go easy on it. You have just had a major upheaval in your life and starting another relationship so soon is not advisable, without even getting to know the other person. Take a lot of time to unwind yourself. There is no need to rush things up. The thought of you becoming lonely forever will drive you crazy and make you go after someone. But remember, “Someday, someone will walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else!”
3. Being angry and revengeful
The feeling of anger will creep up from inside you. You feel betrayed. You feel like you were taken for granted. You want to show your revenge somehow. You feel so hurt that you have a deep grudge towards your ex. You want to somehow prove that your life is better off without your ex. Don’t take any wrong step because you are overcome by anger and don’t be in any sort of haste to prove anything to anyone. If your worth could not be appreciated, then it’s good that it came to an end, right?
2. Loss of trust and loss of hope
Your loved one broke your trust. Someone you trusted more than yourself betrayed you. Then you naturally feel like nothing is worthwhile or no one is trustworthy. You lose hope in everything. You don’t see anything positive in your life. You become so cynical that you come to a conclusion that no good thing will ever happen to you! You put yourself in a condescending position. You must always have that ray of hope. Be optimistic. Life will not always give you thorns. Hope is the only thing that keeps you going!
1. Recurring memories that never seem to fade
Memories! Something that you cannot let go of, no matter how much you try! All the person gave you is memories. It’s what you are left with. Everything will remind you of the person you have lost. Every sad song you hear, will remind you of the times you both spent. It is not easy to let go! Every update of theirs will remind you of them. If you run into them anywhere, you feel awkward. Seeing their pictures, seeing old pictures of you both together will ache. Listening to that person’s voice will make you miss him/her so much. It takes time and a lot of patience to get over a failed relationship. But hey! Guess what? You’re not alone!