Imagine this: You are the owner of a big marketing company and you want to hire a new recruit for your firm. You ask for resumes from the candidates and based on their qualifications you select two individuals having the best qualifications out of all others who applied. You call them for a personal interview round. During the interview you notice that one of the persons is quite confident, speaks clearly and answers all your questions assuredly while the other is too nervous, is stammering and overly apologetic. So who will be your pick for the job? Any sane person will pick the one who is confident in his demeanor. Well who wouldn’t?
Having self confidence matters in almost all aspects of life. People who lack confidence suffer failures and disappointments in their lives. Some are born with super confidence and find their lives comparatively easier than those who lack it. I am also not among those who have naturally high levels of confidence but I have tried over the years to get out of my low self-esteem and perceive my worth that I am who I am and who I want to be, quoting Avril Lavigne. Those who are looking for ways to boost your minimal self confidence can try these 10 ways to increase your self-confidence. Building your self esteem is a slow process and you will have to build your confidence gradually and these tips will definitely help you in the process.
10. What are your insecurities?
When you are alone close your eyes and think about what you think about yourself. If someone asks you to say a few things about yourself what will you say? Stand in front of the mirror and think about what you see. Do you see a beautiful young lady / handsome guy OR do you see a person with slumping shoulders and a haggard face? I have a belief that our insecurities usually arise from how we perceive ourselves. So in the process of trying to boost confidence, one has to first recognize his insecurities, the things that he or she is ashamed of. These insecurities can be anything and not necessarily just be about your looks but also can be your life status, your work, job, educational qualifications, etc.
9. Groom yourself
It is seen that there is a direct proportionality between how you look and the level of confidence in you. This fact is usually used in many fairness creams advertisements showing that how easily you can get your confidence when you use the product and get fair and beautiful. This is however not entirely true and you don’t need to splurge all your money buying beauty products and rely on fairness creams for your success. What I mean by grooming yourself is to make you presentable. Dressing up nicely and appropriately when you go for your work can be very encouraging. Maintain a good body posture. Do not slump your shoulders but sit upright and stop fidgeting all the time. Wear a smile always; remember that when you smile, the world smiles with you. Be aware of how you walk. One must be energetic when he walks.
8. Be with positive people
World is full of diverse kinds of people out of which some we find are much more compatible with us than others. Since man is a social animal, we can’t live our lives in solitude all the time. I agree that some quiet time alone is needed but most of the time we long for company of our friends and family. These people around us play a very important role in maintaining our confidence. What people around us think about us matters a great deal to all of us, even if we don’t show it. We want to get accepted in a popular gang of people and when we don’t we lose our self esteem. It is imperative that when trying to boost one’s self-confidence, one should try to be with people who have a positive approach towards life who are friendly and who understand your situation. You should not be with people who try to make you feel bad by being overly rude to you. And if you do have to meet such people, don’t let them get you. If you are in a relationship with someone who treats you like garbage then probably it is time to move on. Remember that people are just people.
7. Have time for yourself
People who lack confidence in themselves seldom spend quality time with themselves. I will suggest go on a date with yourself. How weird this may sound, this is exactly what you need to understand your worth. Stop trying to please others by thinking that other people’s needs are more important than you. It is your life and you too need to get yourself a bit pampered. Do things that relax you. Eat things that makes you feel good but remember not to over-do the eating part; putting on weight is hardly going to help in boosting confidence. Look in the mirror and smile at yourself; you will instantly feel a surge of positive energy in you. Try to remain calm at all times.
6. Be assertive
The thing that shows your lack of self confidence is your inability to first take decisions and secondly, sticking to them. You just need a small comment of criticism and you will be back to square one. To boost your self confidence, you need to be assertive. Do not let anyone bully you. Remember that you have the right to take your own decisions and not allow anyone to stop you. Take control of a situation; don’t wait on anyone else to take the lead. Such assertiveness is definitely going to help you gain your confidence and increase others trust in you. Stand tall and let everyone notice the confidence oozing out of you.
This is a very positive technique and will help you a lot in many aspects of life. Our brain can’t distinguish between reality and a vivid image that we think about in our minds. You must have noticed that sometimes when in a dream you just feel like you are falling and you wake up with a knee-jerk movement. It is because our brain perceives it to be real and hence our body reacts that way. Visualization is a same kind of process in which you think vividly about a situation you are afraid of. Then you try to tackle the scary situation with full confidence and see the outcome. Next time you are face to face with a similar situation you can tell yourself that you have already experienced it and there is no need to panic.
4. Stop procrastinating
There might be things that you have been putting off for a long a time and not finding the courage to do them. These things can be meeting with some long lost acquaintance, some adventure trip you wanted to go, joining a hobby class, etc. Making the decision to do just do it, though might be difficult is definitely going to help build your confidence. Remember you have nothing to lose but there are great prospects of benefits waiting for you at the end of the road.
3. Celebrate your achievements
Everyone is good at some or the other thing. Make a list of your good points and give yourself the permission to believe that you are good at those things. We have a tendency to get an inferiority complex but such thoughts are self inflicted. Every single thing you do in life is an accomplishment. You too have a talent in you and nobody can take that away from you. Recognize your strengths and focus on them.
2. Take on a challenge
Most of you will agree that when you take a new challenge and you achieve it, you feel that happiness in you and feel a confidence building up in you. What you got to remember is if you don’t go for a task, you will never be able to know whether you could have done it or not. There is a 100% loss in that situation. So you must gather up the courage to at least try and go for it; it is possible that you may face failures but when you are travelling, there are going to be bumps on the road and you can’t just sit back and decide not to complete your journey.
1. Take pride in yourself
In the wise words of Eckhart Tolle “You are here to enable the divine purpose of the universe to unfold. That is how important you are!” This is the final and the most important tip to boost your confidence. You are special and no matter what anyone tells you, you are here in this world for a reason and unless you believe in yourself, no one is going to believe in you. Put that nagging voice at the back of your mind on mute which tells you that you are not worth it. The world may try to bring you down but you got to be yourself and take pride in that.