If a person is asked to list down all those qualities he/she wants in a partner, there is every possibility of the list shooting through rooftops. Owing to our overtly demanding nature, it is very difficult to put an end to the wish-list. There is no logic behind falling in love. It can happen anywhere, anytime and under any circumstance. Sounds scary? Yes it does, though it may be music for the ears of die-hard romantics. Most of the relationships fall apart because what one expects out of it and what one gets are like the two opposite poles on earth. What follows is a series of misunderstandings, accusations, bouts of depression and feelings of despair. Gushing promises of a lifetime of togetherness turn out to be empty and futile. Hence, in order to avoid such detestable situations, both partners should chalk down a plan to make their relationship successful.
Some of the qualities that I am going to talk about can be gauged much before the relationship officially begins and these are the qualities that are perhaps sought after by most people in their prospective partners. The other set of qualities are the ones that individuals should inculcate in themselves to make the relationship work after it happens. The word ‘partner’ is almost synonymous to the word ‘soul-mate’ and hence should be valued and respected. Different people have different set of notions while deciding upon a partner and this list is definitely not looking to negate those views while putting across its own. So here I present top 10 things one expects from a good partner.
10. Impressive personality
Many of you may feel that it is extremely superficial to consider physicality while choosing a partner but let us not be hypocrites here. I would like to add that looks cannot be seen as a quality as it, in no way makes a person a better human-being but even an average-looking person may be able to stun every one around him/her with their sheer aura and captivating communication skills. Hence, the term ‘impressive personality’ should never be mistaken for mere good looks. At the same time, it is important to add that in most cases beauty is what acts as the first criterion which eventually makes a person fall for the other. It is much later when one gets to know the nature of his/her ‘dream boy/girl’.
This is one of the primal qualities you should look for in a partner. If he/she is under-confident about their own abilities, how on earth do you expect them to be your pillar of strength, in times of crisis? Every person wants their respective partners to have clear-cut goals set out for themselves. Being vague about your future is a definite turn-off so, be sure of yourself and your desires and do not go around confusing your partner and taking him/her for granted. At the same time, it should be said that if your partner lacks confidence, try to make him/her feel good about their achievements and bring in that much-needed zeal to their nature. Relationships are all about strengthening the other person.
8. Easy-going and calm outlook
I do not think that any of us would prefer our partners constantly taking a note of our whereabouts, by calling up every 15 minutes. This almost leads to a situation of legitimate stalking. I use the word ‘legitimate’ because the stalker in this case is your certified partner. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is something which you should not be very proud of. Be calm and relaxed even in the middle of a terrible lovers’ tiff. It is bound to work in your favour because if the two involved parties shout their lungs out at the same time, things will take a turn for the worse. Be sensible and prudent if you are at fault and give some rest to your throat.
Now the code of compatibility is very difficult to crack. There are no set of rules determining who will prove to be compatible with whom. Some say that opposites attract while others say that like-minded people are likely to have a better relationship. One positive aspect of having common interests is that the partners get to indulge in activities that interest the two, which in turn strengthens their bond. On the other hand, a chalk and cheese couple may manage to convince the other one to venture into new territories and discover themselves in a better way. That way perhaps the stagnation in life can be averted and things may appear exciting all of a sudden. Lastly, it must be said that it is up to the individual to find out what makes he/she happy as there is no particular key to happiness. Do not blindly conform to ideas but follow your heart.
A surprise planned for your loved one makes him/her forget the little differences that may have cropped up a few days back. Try to do something which your better half will never expect out of you even in their wildest dreams. Take your partner out on a romantic drive and pamper him/her with their favourite delicacies. The best way to impress a girl is perhaps to cook for her and arrange for a candle-light dinner. It may sound cliché and jaded but is sure to work. Girls may gift their boyfriends/husbands a poster of their favourite sports icon. They eat, drink and breathe sports. Don’t believe it? Then, just go and do a little survey for yourself and you will get to know the truth.
If your partner makes his/her mind up to cheat on you, no matter how big a detective you prove to be, they will always come up with ways to evade your eyes. So the best solution to all such stress is to have some trust on your partner. Give him/her some space and do not burden them with questions about their equation with friends, colleagues and even neighbours, belonging to the opposite sex. Note his/her behaviour with you and judge them accordingly. Constant doubts damage a relationship more than anything else. In some cases, it is the incessant nagging by a partner that often prompts the other one to feel detached and demoralized. Think wisely before jumping to conclusions and if indeed you are sure of being back-stabbed, you have every right to walk out of the relationship.
It is not necessary to flaunt your insurmountable knowledge before your partner all the time. It is taken that he/she is fond of you because of certain qualities, taking cognizance of perhaps how “brilliant” you are. Is it then really important to keep asserting yourself time and again? If you try and sound pompous, it may send across a message to your partner that by glorifying yourself, you are in a way belittling him/her. Aren’t there already way too many issues to take care of in a relationship for another impertinent one to grow and flourish? Even if you are not yet in a formal relationship and keep on blabbering about your so-called virtues during interactions, you can be rest assured that the other person will in all likelihood never consider a future with you. I am sure you will never risk losing the love of your life for such a petty reason.
3. Loyalty and honesty
The above two qualities are almost like the two sides of the same coin. In these times of fluctuating emotions, loyalty is something a person definitely looks for in a partner. Do not be a heart-breaker because someday someone will surely break yours. Learn to value the feelings of your partner and if you remain loyal to him/her, then the road ahead is smooth and joyous. Love does not come with a gurantee card. It may last for a lifetime or fade away in a few weeks time. If it fades away and you feel drawn towards another person, at least make it known to your partner. Be honest if you cannot be loyal. Cheating scars a relationship and damages it in such a way that nothing on earth can mend it again.
2. Sense of humour
Life becomes bland without a pinch of humour sprinkled over it. It is like the spice you cannot afford to miss. We toil all day long and are totally drained at the end of it. After all of it, if we happen to have an entertaining partner as company, what more do we need? Lighten up the mood by cracking jokes, no matter how silly and stupid they are. It is believed that if you manage to make your beloved laugh and keep him/her in good spirits, more than half the battle is won. So dump that sullen face and bring out the wit and humour.
1. Loving and caring nature
All that I have talked about so far would be no use if you are not loving and benevolent towards your partner. Do not adopt an indifferent attitude to their troubles. Encourage him/her to share their problems with you. Love is the basis which binds two people together. Make it known to your partner how much you value him/her. Love should be expressed and it is not mandatory for expensive gifts to act as that medium of expression. A few kind and genuine words do the trick better than anything else.